There used to be a beach in North Beach, then a fraudulent financier formed a fantastic, F-shaped fabrication to facilitate fleets, ferries, and further favorable fundraising. Forthwith, factories and fishing folks filled in fairly fast, the flora and fauna fading. The financier famously frauded Frisco and fled, finally finishing the fiasco, forlorn and forgotten. And the beach is, too.
Where's the F-ing Beach in North Beach? celebrates the F-shaped pier that later became Fisherman's Wharf by examining North Beach with F-tinted glasses. You'll get the general low-down on San Francisco's "Little Italy" by exploring fires, fairs, film, faith, fiction, foreigners, funny folks, famous flashers, food, fashion, and farchitecture, to name a few.
North Beach is one of the City's favorite destinations, an authentic neighborhood close to Chinatown, the Financial District, and the inauthentic Fisherman's Wharf. It's packed with bars, coffee shops, and plenty of restaurants. Or just sit back and people-watch; it's fun, festive, and friendly.
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Where's the F-ing Beach in North Beach? is a family-friendly tour of North Beach, focusing on the general history of the neighborhood and the question everyone asks: where's the beach? On a clear day, the views are fantastic, so pack a camera.
This broad overview of North Beach is a daytime-only tour of one of the City's most popular destinations, and our only tour sponsored by a letter. For an evening tour focusing on the historic nightlife of North Beach, try our Nude, Lewd, and Crude tour.
tour distance: about 13 blocks tour duration: about two hours hills: three blocks of downhill and two blocks of slightly downhill walking ending location: Pacific and Columbus Avenues, a few blocks north of the Portsmouth Square Garage
This tour starts, but does not end, on Telegraph Hill. Do not park on Telegraph Hill!
Coit Tower and panoramic views from Telegraph Hill
Fabulous fire folklore!
The lush gardens along the Filbert Steps
Washington Square Park, famous for its statue of Ben Franklin and its trapezoidal shape (and lack of parking)
Jack Kerouac Alley, City Lights Bookstore, and Vesuvio
The Condor, birthplace of topless dancing
Plus fun facts, free fudge (frequently), festivities, fables, fiction, and FOOT! foolery
Advance purchase required. Tours usually sell out in advance! Get information, check availability & buy tickets online: North Beach Comedy Walking
Tour
Or to purchase by phone, call Zerve at 800.979.3370 or 212.209.3370 (int'l)
Here are our regular tours.
We can also customize a fun tour for your group or family. write us for more information
CHASING THE DRAGON
disorient yourself in the history and mystery of Chinatown
